This about sums it up. At times I am running through the maze other times I am lost. Right now I am both. My journaling has been one of the biggest disappointments over the past year. I felt journaling had to be a total positive outlet and I was wrong. Journaling should be an everything outlet. It seems when I was journaling regularly I was content with where I was. I have meandered the last year in mediocrity and wonder why I am stuck where I am stuck. Its not that I blame anybody but myself but it is pretty tough not to have an excuse for failure. I have blamed my schedule without adapting. I have blamed others for not motivating me when motivation comes from within. When it really comes down to it I probably was just looking for a way out. I don’t have a way out, I don’t want a way out.
I will get back to goal setting but for now I only want to journal success and failures. Yes that is correct failure. Most of us want to hide failure but it truly means I am still trying. So what I have done not what I am going to do. For now... I understand that this is not the way to mastery but I need to take steps towards that and I am not there right now. This weekend I worked 37 hours in 3 days. That’s a bit more then normal but weekends are always when I work the bulk of my hours. Normally I would make time for very little else. Instead I wrote a long over due email to a teacher. I committed to a project and completed my 100 push ups for the day. Today I am journaling. I failed to do my sit-ups commitment. I failed to start a challenge from my core curriculum teacher. My biggest success was a week ago I started Mike Dolce Living lean. I have lost 5 lbs in the first week and feel great. Good enough that it has motivated me to change. I have a diet partner and together we have made the changes necessary for success. Thank you Alanna. I will continue to post positive and negative progress of the plan.
B

Comments (1)

On February 20, 2012 at 1:28 PM , Sherri Donohue said...

It's not from our successes where we learn and grow, it's from our failures and challenges and by blogging about it all makes us real and also gives a connection. Besides, you never know just who you are helping just by being the real you. Blog on Brady!